Nancy’s Life Parties

at the Gay Head Cliffs on July 10th & August 25th, 2018

and at the George Sand statue in Paris

on her favorite holiday, Thanksgiving, in Nov. 2018.


Of grief & gratitude

I'm constantly filled with a sense of desolation and gratitude as I prepare Nancy's manuscripts for publication, revisit her favorite spots, rearrange her earrings, kiss her image in photos and paintings, and write here - at her desk - looking over the water garden, forest and sea she wanted to return to, but couldn't.

I've spoken to her day and night on the beaches of the Vineyard and banks of the Seine - murmuring, invoking, raging, and thanking her… always thanking her.

I sometimes feel robbed and remorseful for spending any time away from my sweetheart, and, finally, for my failure to save her, but every thought of her also stuns me with joy.

Although I'm steeped in grief, I’m grateful to everyone who came to celebrate Nancy or has paid tribute to her curiosity, delight, moral clarity, generosity and activism. She exulted in being solidly alive and surrounded by the ocean, birdsong, wind, friends and family, and although we've lost her, she would have wanted us to remember her with long blissful swims, searching looks, dancing steps and waves of joy.

My love to all of you,

Duncan

caldwellnd(at)aol.com


Celebrating the 40th anniversary of our meeting

in the same room at Shakespeare & Company in Paris.


When we lived on the barge with rowboats beside it in the background.


I’m so grateful to everyone who sent the photos, memories and tributes

to Nancy that you’ll find on the following pages:

Tributes to Nancy Caldwell,

More tributes to Nancy and her own writings,

Eulogies for my love

and

Nancy’s beautiful life.

I’m sure that you’ll also be moved by the following essays

that Nancy wrote under the name of Nancy Leenson Caldwell:

Listening to the Kigali Night”,

which appeared in The New York Times,

and

Memories to Moments on the Cancer Caravan

which was published by the Vineyard Gazette.

***

Finally, here are

- some pictures of my love soon after we met

- and a link to a page about the memorial for her

that Nancy’s Parisian friends and colleagues held

beside the George Sand statue in the Jardin du Luxembourg

on Thanksgiving Day 2018.


Nancy Caldwell curled up in Vincennes, circa 1976
Nancy Caldwell with soot on her face in 1976
Nancy after playing the sooty plate game in the room she sublet from Stephanie Stolin at Chateau de Vincennes
Nancy & Duncan Caldwell during the heat wave & drought of 1976
Nancy playing with me as I was writing a novel in her room at Chateau de Vincennes.
Clowning with our guest, Trevor Stuart (previously Trevor Smith), while he was studying mime & acting in Paris.
Duncan being teased by Nancy & Trevor while writing a novel at Chateau de Vincennes in 1976
Nancy & Duncan in the hull of the Klaidonis in 1977 or 78
Duncan and Nancy Caldwell on the deck of the Klaidonis, Paris, in 1977 or 78
Nancy on the deck of our barge in 1977 or 78
Nancy at the wheelhouse of our barge on the quai de Conti, Paris, circa 1977
Nancy at the wheelhouse of the Klaidonis, circa 1977
Tweaking Nancy’s nose in Bethesda the day after returning to the family on Christmas Eve
Cutting our cake in Randallstown, Maryland , after “eloping” on July 10, 1978. Nancy’s wearing the Greek dress we’d bought as her wedding dress.
Trevor, Nancy and Duncan clowning around. I wish we could have all done so forever.
My love standing on our boat in front of the Pont Neuf, statue of le Vert Galant - Henri IV, and La Samaritaine in the background. Paris, circa 1977.
Nancy wearing her red coral necklace.

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